A long journey

It is tempting to share a spot of family news though I know how presumptuous that can be on social media. So, please forgive me, those of you who have troubles enough. Some of you will know that my wife Carol was badly affected by Covid and her symptoms over the last two years ultimately propelled her into our hospital's Long Covid Management Team.  It seemed possible that her serious 'brain fog', muscle weakness, general fatigue were caused by her covid illness early 2020.  For 7 months she was counselled by team members, given tests to complete and literature to read. Everyone who dealt with her was kindly and sensitive. But, 3 months ago the team had a meeting which involved a wide range of experts who together decided that Carol should be signed off the long covid track and put onto the Memory Clinic track.

Shifting tracks proved complicated with her details lost between the doctors' request and clinic. Eventually, we received notice that she has been admitted to the waiting list of 36 weeks. Apparently, since covid hit the number of doctor referrals has so rocketed about patient memory problems that this is the quickest you can have a first appointment.

In the period of waiting we are both learning much.  Some years ago in the US Carol purchased (from a charity shop - as usual) an attractive plaque which reads TODAY IS THE DAY.  It's large and unavoidable. When I first saw it I was critical, suspecting it to be a new age self-help slogan requiring effort to be positive each morning. Saying to yourself TODAY IS THE DAY as though by sheer self-will we should see it as a special day.

But I have come to recognize it as an invaluable trigger on our journey. Every time I see it I say THIS IS THE DAY THAT THE LORD HAS MADE; LET US REJOICE AND BE GLAD IN IT (Psalm 118:24). What a splendid perspective that gives to days that may seem mundane and even troubled.  That every day is a gift from the Lord, and an opportunity to remember his promises of love and strength holding us through another 24 hours. Rejoicing isn't easy but to approach each day as a fresh gift in the unfailing grace of our Lord can bring gladness in the mundane and troubling. Yes, it can. 

TV saga and delight

I know there's (too) much mundane stuff on this blog but this week has continued a saga which began last November when our TV picture began seriously breaking up.  In her current tiredness, Carol much enjoys TV but, sadly, her regular pitiful cry began: 'Michael, the picture's gone again!'  No channel seemed exempt. I called up the company supplying our account and entered a series of lengthy earnest conversations with well-meaning advisers, who gave me instructions about checking leads etc. which required uncomfortable/impossible gymnastic moves.  Each intervention was only successful for a day or two. I became used to ceding control of my smart phone camera so they saw with their own eyes. Through December to March the plaintiff cry echoed. Twice TV boxes were sent out complete with an engineer.  Eventually, in exasperation, just before Easter one adviser told me I needed my aerial checked. They gave me a number to call. 

The aerial specialist answered hesitantly saying he was in the middle of a field and earlier in the day had fallen off a ladder. He said he would contact me later. I wondered! Yet he did the next morning asking if I was the gentleman who had phoned when he was in the middle of a field.  A delightful, unusual man in his 70's he agreed to come. Bringing in his meter and connecting with the aerial socket he expressed amazement that we have been receiving any signal at all. It's strength and quality was barely registering. He pronounced that our solar panels were preventing a clear signal and the new tall houses at the bottom of the garden weren't helping either. 

I had offered him tea or coffee when he arrived but he said he would wait until he had sorted the problem. Nearly 2 hours later we sat down for a welcome cuppa when he began opening up about his life and situation. Asking me about what job I had, I told him that I was a Baptist minister. At which he lit up.  Not because he is a churchgoer but because of his recent experience in the village where he lived. Feeling depressed and concerned he was walking down the main street when he saw the local Baptist minister. Quite wonderfully (and it really did thrill me!) he spoke about this minister's high reputation in the community.  He stopped him and asked whether he could speak with him.  I'm not quite sure where they went but the minister immediately agreed and the conversation (which turned out to be 2 hours long) proved so helpful. 'He's the kind of person who is so special you know they care and are wise. I shall never forget him being there for me'.  

I don't know this minister but I have told one of his friends all about this testimony who has promised to pass on this encouragement. To be salt and light on the main street is a great story, isn't it?.  I was so glad to hear it. 

P.S. Our aerial situation is still not properly fixed and we anticipate a third visit soon, but he has fitted some widget which cuts down the pixellating and the plaintiff cries.A

AWOL Birthday Book

 A desperate search in our house over many weeks has accelerated with increasing yelps of despair. Critical to the smooth running of Carol's birthday/anniversary calendar has been a well-worn, red leather covered note book, containing every day of the year. Painstakingly, Carol has entered birthdays as new members of the family have arrived, as friends have become close, as her big heart has embraced a selection of people through our ministries in UK and USA (and, more importantly their big hearts have embraced us).

Matching this careful record have been her filing cabinets of cards, collected through the ages for every kind of situation.  She has labelled them and either side of this desk as I type I can see the drawers signed: Thinking of You; Humour, Arty/blank; Thank You; Family Birthday, Birthday (2 general drawers) Special occasions; Cambridge/Blank and several more plus selection boxes. Her vast collection encompasses all human conditions and, for birthdays, she has anticipated celebrating specific ages with several 80 and 90 cards (sometimes bought with specific people in mind).  If you are even slightly impressed you should be, for sending cards and marking occasions has been one of Carol's distinctive trademarks through the years.

You can imagine our distress therefore when this repository of unsent cards, especially birthday cards, is sabotaged by the total loss of the master list in the little red book.  Each month Carol would look up the latest batch to receive from her collection.  Now, at a total loss (well not quite total because we do remember family birthdays) we are hearing from people concerned that no birthday card arrived. 'Carol never forgets - what's happened?' they say. I lamely explain the lost address book and the general state of confusion this end.  But it's sad. Really sad.  If you happen to be someone Carol has always remembered let me apologize right now. Sorry!

Big misunderstanding

Today I assumed I had completed my Escape Pain regime. I had asked Hannah at the outset how many sessions the clinic would run. When she said six I breathed a sigh of relief. It's been an effort to attend every Tuesday and Friday at the hospital and, though other class members are pleasant fellow pilgrims who have helped make each session worth attending, I was looking forward to dropping this weekly commitment.

Today I learned that the clinic runs for 6 weeks!  I am just half-way through!  How I came to make this mistake (hearing loss/ concentration blip/ wishful thinking) is a mystery.  But I felt rebuked when one of the other members expressed her gratitude that the NHS was spending so much time on us. Indeed, she said that she already felt a great improvement in her mobility.  

Each session begins with education on some key area like 'pacing yourself' or, today, 'using heat and cold appropriately'.  Then we limber up with a group exercise where each of us in turn suggests one of the many exercises we have learned.  Today I chose the shoulder roll backwards and forwards. (Yes, I thought you would be interested!)  Then we follow clockwise a series of timed exercises set up around the gym. At least one is always excruciating to perform and while Abba accompanies our flexing I tell myself it must be improving my joint pain

Apparently, having reached half-way, our next session comprises some heart-to-heart story-telling, preferably with positive stories of our progress so far. So, this is another of life's lessons that I should see another 6 sessions as sheer opportunity and be grateful. Yes, that's the challenge.

Carol's 80th.

On Monday Carol reached the 80 year milestone (a few months ahead of me - an age gap of which I have made much as a younger man!)  Necessarily because of Carol's poor health, it has been low key with a couple of meals shared with friends, including our church home group meeting in the large garden of one of our members.  One, a professional signwriter, had designed a large poster blazoning Carol's birthday which was pasted to a window with balloons.  Senior fish and chips were enjoyed followed by delicious sweets and a dairy free chocolate cake with unblowable candles!  It was such a kind generous time with all these newish friends (we joined the church about 8 years ago!) giving their best.

One of them had earlier given Carol an attractively wrapped gift which looked like containing a picture.  Indeed it did.  To our delight Lesley had written a poem set in a delightful design. 

For Carol on her 80th birthday. 

Eighty years, and each a thread 

In woven grace where angels tread 

A Pastor's wife, yet more than that- 

A heart where love and wisdom sat

With ink and flourish, line by line,

Your calligraphy made words divine.

And every scarf around your neck

A gentle, artful warmth reflects.

You've lit more candles than we know,

Not just with wax, but kindness' glow.

Your table, open, wide, and true,

Has welcomed many, just like you.

For those in need, you took their part,

With steady hands and servant's heart

Now eighty rings this lovely chime,

A life well lived, a sacred time.

So here's to Carol, graceful, bright,

A beacon still, a shining light.

Lesley has only known Carol a very few years but she's captured so much about her character, calligraphy, love of colourful matching scarves, hospitality giver, and compassion with kindness that has marked Carol's life. I know many of you readers won't know her but you can imagine my pride and gratitude for this creative tribute.

BQ Vol.56.2

My copy of Baptist Quarterly dropped through the letter box yesterday . This journal aims to engage with Baptist heritage and history, not only to encourage readers to recall the past but enable them to reflect on Baptist life today. With the big purpose of challenging and inspiring Baptists for tomorrow.  I have been a subscriber for over 50 years having been guilt-tripped (!) into commitment right at the beginning of my ministry.  I have always been interested in history and Earnest Payne, a noted Baptist historian, General Secretary of the Baptist Union (and someone with whom I had a personal relationship) pressed home the need for young ministers like myself to become regular readers.

Through the years there has been much to encourage and stimulate reflection. The articles are well researched, ranging far and wide. Sometimes I confess they are too niche to hold my attention. Only once have I been published with my long paper responding to the World Council of Churches' Baptism, Eucharist and Mission document (BEM) - or to be accurate to its Baptism section.

I never, ever thought that I would appear in its pages with my own story!  But the edition arriving yesterday begins with Ian Randall's paper: Cambridge, Baptists and the Formation of Minds and Hearts. He presented the paper last year at a 2024 conference on Baptists and Education.  Ian is a good friend and when I read his paper I couldn't believe that his focus on the 1980's brought together my ministry at St. Andrew's Street Baptist Church, Roy Clements at Eden Baptist Church, the Cambridge Papers - examining key issues of the time - and a number of other areas of Baptist involvement.  As he puts it: ' The Baptist initiatives outlined here, not previously analysed, show ways in which Baptists in Cambridge contributed to Christian thought and action through churches, publications, centres and groups.'

As I re-read it I felt honoured to have been included in such meticulous research (Janice, Ian's wife is co-researcher). Undeniably the 80's were glorious years to be alive in Cambridge with God's blessing and power at work in many ways.  Was I startled by some of the details unearthed? Most definitely. Was I dumbfounded to find them in the BQ jostling alongside much heavyweight material?  Too true!  It is a genuine privilege to have a section of your life charted in this way, put in the wider context where I have so many happy memories.  So, it was a good day to open the post and see my BQ. Thank you Ian and Janice.

Escape Pain

I have just been to my first Escape Pain clinic. Over 4 months ago my hospital physiotherapist selected me for this programme.  Partly, I think, because of desperation that his set exercises (since June 2024) had reached their (his/mine) exhaustion limit.  I always tried to be positive but, bluntly, sometimes the exercises themselves seem to backfire. And, partly, because this clinic is a collective approach as eight people share experiences to boost confidence.

I am one of the oldest but there is something encouraging being surrounded by hobbling, creaking limbs and pilgrim brave souls. Each of us was given a name badge so that Hannah (our noble leader) could address us and we could begin group dynamics.  We met in the hospital gym full of equipment around the echoing walls. In the middle we sat on chairs and we told how Escape Pain would allow us to become more confident in dealing with our joint pain for the long term by helping us learn techniques for avoiding the Vicious Cycle: Pain - Prolonged Rest- Overactivity.  So, we are to expect advice about safe exercise and pacing; healthy diet, managing flare ups, setting personal goals.  Always gaining tips from other people in the same condition. 

That sounds good! Our first session had warm up exercises and then rotation around eight stations.  I had a couple of thoughts.  One was general.  How optimistic Escape Pain is! I suppose you have to be positive but ageing takes its toll.  It made me think about false messaging that some people hear about the gospel. That faith in Jesus Christ means escaping pain in charmed loved lives. A kind of spiritual insurance police. No, discipleship is in the real world where Jesus identified with our human condition and now lives with us and the Holy Spirit, helping us to live with suffering and pain.

The other thought brought a smile. When we were leaving one of the women came over to me and asked me if I was Michael Quicke.  She said she thought there wouldn't be many Michael Q's (my label) in the world. It turns out she is a Baptist minister's widow whose husband was minister where my father pastored in the 1960's.  Instantly, the network of connections and relationships hummed into action. I was so happy to meet her.  That will make a difference as we meet up again. 

In this odd blog, which blends personal bits and pieces with more solid stuff, I shall report in at least once as the clinic progresses.