83 types of sleep disorder

I know I post about some odd incidents. Some of you may have endured an overnight stay in a sleep clinic. I experienced one this past week. My doctor thought my increased weariness is due to a sleep disorder and after tests I was admitted to the newly opened, classy, NHS Royal Papworth Hospital.  On arriving each of us was given a hotel standard room with TV, Wifi, ensuite etc. The leaflet had illlustrated a patient with straps around his body and head - holding various electrodes while he slept peacefully.

Admitted at 6:30 pm, I was in my pyjamas by 8:00 with four attachments to my feet. Then at intervals other electrodes were fitted including nine to various places on my head, finishing with the gadget that would normally supply oxygen to the nose (but I guess was about my snoring).  A battery pack was mounted around my chest with leads feeding into it from everywhere including an oxygen monitor on a finger.  Each time staff were pleasant and cheerful and when I was finally trussed up one of them said I should take a picture.  I wondered if I could possibly sleep with all this stuff on me. 'Oh, you will', they assured me.

They claimed the equipment would provide the most sophisticated analysis possible at the current time. They would also video me.  One nurse told me there were over 83 different types of sleep disorder. Really?!  To say I slept fitfully would be an understatement.  The next morning I was unpacked, given porridge, I ordered my lunch sandwich and then waited for the results which a consultant would give me sometime in the afternoon.

On arrival he appeared to have limitless time to spend with me.  He asked about my history and my assessment of my night's sleep.  I burbled on that it had been a poor night because of the discomfort and I felt something of an imposter because so many others I know have poorer sleep.  At last he spoke - apparently I had shown one of the worst nights recorded in the unit! He said that leg electrodes would always show movements and up to 15 times an hour was usual.  However, in my deep sleep I reached levels of 112-115 per hour.  No wonder sleep's not been restful. Of this I was blissfully unaware!

I now have the chart showing details of my disastrous night as well as a prescribed course of treatment.  If it's not too personal I may share later if I get down from 115 movements!